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Tracking Cat Food Consumption

This was 100% my wife’s idea. You see, we have two cats, and because her cat seemed to be losing weight (and because my cat eats like a pig) we were concerned that her cat was not getting any of the food we left out all day long. So when I was told to “Get your time lapse thingy!” I sprung into action and set it up to capture a day’s worth of footage of the cats eating food.

We learned that my cat certainly eats a lot (but doesn’t eat all the food) and my wife’s cat is getting a chance to eat throughout the day, so I’ll call this experiment successful.

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Server Errors

tapps posted something to Twitter, I replied and turned it into a joke, and it went a little crazy from there with some help from janiukjf and chernowa … Here’s the transaction. (I’ve saved it here since at some point it may will become unavailable on Twitter.)

Server Errors

As long as we’re on the subject, I thought I’d expand on the whole “Server Error” joke and attempt to come up with a restaurant/food/server joke for every HTTP code.

Informational 1xx – This is when your server introduces themselves to you.

100 Continue – This happens if you interrupt the server before they tell you the specials.

101 Switching Protocols – If the server realizes you are being difficult, stupid, or drunk, they may change the way they talk to you.

Successful 2xx – Hooray! You’ve managed to interact successfully with your server.

200 OK – Server is OK, hasn’t screwed anything up yet.

201 Created – You’ve decided what you wanted to order, and told the server.

202 Accepted – The server has accepted your order.

203 Non-Authoritative Information – If someone tells you that the burgers are good, find out who they heard it from. (Make sure it wasn’t Yelp.)

204 No Content – This is what happens when you are not content with your food.

205 Reset Content – This is what happens when you send the food back.

206 Partial Content – This is what happens when the server forgot something you ordered.

Redirection 3xx – This is what happens when the server starts coming towards your table, but turns and goes the other direction.

300 Multiple Choices – Typically, this will happen when they list the desserts… Choosing is quite difficult!

301 Moved Permanently – Occasionally you may want to move to another table, perhaps by the window, or the fireplace.

302 Found – Hooray! You thought you lost your server, but you found them.

303 See Other – This is what happens when you try to order from an employee who is not your server.

304 Not Modified – This is what happens when you send it back and then they return it without doing anything to it.

305 Use Proxy – This is when you have someone order for you, you know, if you have to go to the bathroom or something.

307 Temporary Redirect – This is when you make everyone else order before you because you haven’t decided yet.

Client Error 4xx – Oops! You’re the client, you’ve done something wrong… You probably pissed off your server.

400 Bad Request – Again, you screwed up. Did you try ordering a steak at a vegan restaurant?

401 Unauthorized – This is what happens if someone tries to order for you but you stop them.

402 Payment Required – Most restaurants rely on this one.

403 Forbidden – Asking your server for his/her phone number.

404 Not Found – Server is missing… probably on break.

405 Method Not Allowed – This is what happens if you try to order the kids meal when you’re a full grown adult.

406 Not Acceptable – If you get “grabby” with your server, well,that’s just not acceptable.

407 Proxy Authentication Required – If someone orders for you, and the server asks if it’s OK that they ordered for you…

408 Request Timeout – Server asks ” Do you need a little more time to decide?” Then leaves. (This is usually followed by a 404 error.)

409 Conflict – You really want the lobster, but you also really want the streak. Can’t have both!

410 Gone – Server has quit. Probably on a bus half way home already.

411 Length Required – This one is typically only used when ordering subs.

412 Precondition Failed – You may have ordered alcohol, but you’re not 21 yet. #fail

413 Request Entity Too Large – You know that 72 ounce steak that they give you, and if you eat the whole thing your meal is free? Don’t do it! It’s too large.

414 Request-URI Too Long – Occasionally someone will try to order everything on the menu…

415 Unsupported Media Type – Don’t try ordering your meal by singing.

416 Requested Range Not Satisfiable – You want free range beef. They don’t have it.

417 Expectation Failed – Your meal sucked.

Server Error 5xx – Server screwed up. It happens. (Go tell Yelp.)

500 Internal Server Error – Occasionally your server will be having emotional problems. Perhaps he (or she) is in love with two people at the same time…

501 Not Implemented – Not everything comes deep-fried and/or covered in cheese.

502 Bad Gateway – Typically an error between the server and the kitchen.

503 Service Unavailable – Server is not serving. See 404 and 410.

504 Gateway Timeout – This happens when the server gets too busy to relay your order to the kitchen.

505 HTTP Version Not Supported – Usually this only happens with older browsers. (Senior citizens who don’t know what to order. Or where they are. Or what year it is.)

Whew! Never let it be that I don’t know when to quit… because really, I don’t. END OF FILE

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Roasted Garlic Asiago Dip

Roasted Garlic Asiago Dip

Ingredients

  • 1 head garlic
  • 16 ounces cream cheese
  • 2 cups shredded asiago cheese
  • 1/3 cup heavy cream
  • 1/2 cup sour cream
  • 1/2 cup mozzarella cheese, shredded

Directions

  1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
  2. Cut the garlic head in half along the “equator” (with root and stem ends representing the poles).
  3. Place the garlic, cut side down on a foil lined baking sheet and roast uncovered 40 to 45 minutes or until tender. (This is the hardest part!)
  4. To remove the garlic, turn heads upside down and gently squeeze the garlic out of the skins.
  5. Reduce oven temperature to 350 degrees F.
  6. With a food processor or electric mixer, blend cream cheese, Asiago cheese, heavy cream, and sour cream until well-blended, add garlic and blend again.
  7. Place mixture into a casserole or baking dish and top with shredded mozzarella.
  8. Bake about 20 minutes until golden brown on top.
  9. Serve with firm crusty bread, crackers, pita bread, or whatever.

I’m expected to make this every Thanksgiving, and now the family wants it on Christmas as well. I’m pretty sure it’s the only reason I get invited… Anyway, here’s the recipe, so now you can make it yourself and I don’t even have to show up!

But seriously folks, after it shows up, this stuff is gone in like 10 minutes, and people who miss out on it are sad and have even been known to cry. So don’t ruin the day, make your own Roasted Garlic Asiago Dip and be the Hero of the Holidays!

(Sorry I couldn’t get a photo of the final product, but I needed to get this published to fulfill some promises… Enjoy!)

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Rice Noodles

Rice Noodles

(consider it cc:by)

Whew! I sure do love me some rice noodles! Specifically, Thai Kitchen Instant Rice Noodle Soup. (Or as I like to call it “ramen for grown-ups.”)

Tonight’s drawing is of my dinner… which worked out well, because after cooking, it takes a little time for the noodles to cool down enough to eat… just about long enough to complete a drawing.

Enjoy!

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Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins

Still got some pumpkin? Already made Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies? Well, I’ve got another recipe for you… Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins

Ingredients

  • 1 2/3 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 1 teaspoon cinnamon
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/4 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 cup plain canned pumpkin
  • 1/2 cup melted butter
  • 6 ounces chocolate chips

Directions

  1. Heat oven to 350 degrees.
  2. Grease muffin cups or line with muffin papers.
  3. Thoroughly mix flour, sugar, cinnamon, baking soda, baking powder, and salt in a large bowl.
  4. Break eggs into another bowl.
  5. Add pumpkin and butter to eggs and whisk until well-blended.
  6. Stir in chocolate chips.
  7. Pour over dry ingredients and fold in just until moistened.
  8. Scoop into tins and bake 20-25 minutes.

I use silicone muffin pans and canola spray, and I tend to add the dry ingredients to the moist stuff, which is backwards, but still seems to work fine. I also tend to freeze most of them, which works well when you’re running out the door and need something for lunch (or a mid-morning snack) as they defrost over the course of a few hours and are ready to eat.

It should go without saying that you should use raw sugar (not processed!) and unbleached flour (not “enriched” or bleached!) and any other more natural/organic materials you can find. But it doesn’t. So I’m saying it.

Enjoy!